Golfer Carter Jenkins recalled the final conversation he had with his high school teammate and friend, Grayson Murray.
“I asked him about the Masters and the U.S. Open he was going to be in and how he was playing,” Jenkins told the Raleigh News & Observer on Tuesday, May 28.
Jenkins said he ran into Murray a few weeks ago at Raleigh’s Wildwood Green Golf Club, where the two would often compete together as teammates at Leesville Road High School.
“It was just a friendly, casual conversation, back and forth,” Jenkins said. “I didn’t expect it to be the last.”
Murray was found dead on Saturday, May 25, at the age of 30. In a statement released by his parents, Eric and Terry, it was revealed that Murray died via suicide.
Jenkins will compete in this weekend’s Korn Ferry Tour event, the UNC Healthcare Championship, at Raleigh Country Club. Preparing for the hometown event after the loss of Murray has not been easy.
As Jenkins said, “I’ve opened my eyes and I knew he didn’t.”
“When I first got the news, I didn’t really know what to think,” Jenkins continued. “It was a little bit of an out-of-body experience more than anything else. I sat there for about five minutes; didn’t really know how to react to it.”
As the days have passed, however, Jenkins said “it’s gotten more and more real, which makes it harder and harder.”
“Especially being home this week at Raleigh Country Club,” he explained. “Every time I step on the property, it brings back what we used to do when we were in high school and when we were both out here. It makes it harder to wrap your head around the fact he’s not here any longer. You have to accept that.”
Jenkins hopes Murray — who was very candid about his mental health journey over the years — will be remembered for more than just his admitted struggles.
“For as well-documented as his troubles have been, I think the positive impact he had on people when he was around them, the passion he had for the game that he loved — that was all he ever wanted to do — leaves a bigger mark,” Jenkins said. “Because everyone has troubles. Everyone has demons. He took his demons and was still able to have a phenomenal career and a phenomenal life with them. He was so comfortable in being who he was and made everyone else around him better for that.”
Jenkins acknowledged that while it’s been difficult, he has managed to take some solace in knowing that Murray has hopefully found a calm resting place.
“He left a mark here in Raleigh everyone will remember, that’s for sure,” Jenkins said of his late friend. “He will be sorely missed, but I know he’s at peace with himself now.”
If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call or text 988 or chat at 988lifeline.org.
